


pros and cons

by egoistkid



Series: please eat [2]
Category: Mean Girls (2004), Mean Girls - Richmond/Benjamin/Fey
Genre: Anorexia, Eating Disorders, Established Relationship, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Journaling
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-27
Updated: 2019-02-27
Packaged: 2019-11-06 15:40:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 602
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17942495
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/egoistkid/pseuds/egoistkid
Summary: Journaling-- “It can be really therapeutic, plus, it’s good to write out these things,” Janis had said, her newest idea on how to nudge Regina onto a path that may not be recovery just yet, but a teensy baby step in the right direction.





	pros and cons

_ ‘Write about the pros and cons of your eating disorder.’ _

The blonde furrows her brow at the screen and turns to face her girlfriend, who merely blinks and motions for her to start writing. Journaling--  _ “It can be really therapeutic, plus, it’s good to write out these things,”  _ Janis had said, her newest idea on how to nudge Regina onto a path that may not be recovery just yet, but a teensy baby step in the right direction. She knew it would be a long process for Regina to even start thinking of recovering, given that she’s had anorexia since she was 12 years old. 

When she received the diagnosis, her mother refused to believe it.  _ “There’s nothing wrong with my daughter. She’s a perfectly normal little girl, thank you very much,”  _ she said on the subject. She’s still in denial about it, and pretends that Regina’s eating habits are perfectly normal. It’s a don’t ask, don’t tell kind of policy. This only makes Janis worry even more.

“Go on,” She tucks a piece of dark hair behind her ear and motions again to the notebook and pen in front of Regina. “Just start writing everything you think of. There are no rights or wrongs here,” 

“Okay, okay. Just because it seems important to you,” Regina stammers quietly, picking up the pen. 

**PROS**

_ Losing weight _

_ Helps me feel happy when I reach a goal _

_ Keeps me motivated and determined _

_ Less junk food intake _

_ Clothes look better on me _

She pauses. Are those really all of the pro’s she can think of? The page seems so empty. She glances at Janis as if to question, ‘what now?’. “Okay, now write the cons,” She says, guiding her hand back to the paper. 

**CONS**

_ Makes my girlfriend worry _

Regina drops her pen. “That’s it,” 

“You and I both know that’s not it. Come on, use your brain, love,” Janis encourages her. Regina huffs out a sigh and continues the list.

_ Unhealthy _

_ Fainting _

_ Dizziness _

_ Weakened muscles _

_ Not being able to eat when I want to _

_ TMI, but constipation  _

_ Headaches _

_ Not getting enough nutrients _

_ Excluded from lunch hangouts _

_ Bad for my teeth _

_ Sore throat _

She stops. The cons list is long-- even with her tiny handwriting, it’s way longer than the pros and that kind of bugs her. Apparently Janis notices this as well, because she gently says, “See how long that list is?” Regina swallows, a sudden lump forming in her throat. “No pain, no gain, right?” Her voice wavers when she says it. She expects Janis to snap at her and scold her for being crazy and not seeing reason, but instead she wraps her arm around her shoulders and hugs her tight. “I’m so scared for you, Regina. I don’t want to show it, but God, I’m scared,” Her eyes are filled with tears, and Regina’s definitely sobbing like a baby at this point. Why did this have to be so hard? Why did she have to make everyone worry about her? 

“Don’t be.” She gives her a strained smile. “I’m really getting better. This journaling thing was really thought-provoking.” 

This makes Janis smile. “Even if it is the kind of psychiatric therapy shit you hate?” Regina returns the smile and mumbles, “Yes, Janis,” 

She hugs her again and wipes her eyes. Regina stares at the wall, knowing that the journaling didn’t really help and she still has no intention of even being close to stopping her behaviors. But she hugs Janis, she rests her head on her shoulder and closes her eyes, and allows herself to rest in the warmth of her arms. 


End file.
